Internal Derangement

As I black out
I begin to doze
In a stupor
My eyes slowly close
My fingers move slow as I write
As I write to you
Wondering how many of you
Are like me
Or were like me
Or worse
Will be

Its not easy to see
Anything
Not just eye sight but reality
Fake serenity
You truly see nothing
Nothing you truly want to see

But your not thinking
Your not doing
Your certainly not winning
Not getting rich though some do financially
But not for long

Nothing really lasts
And as you remember your past
After you finally have
Gotten past
This battle for your life
With yourself you fight
Then you find it
Then you can see it
Then you can be it
Be anything
Anything
Young one or old one, middle aged
You can see
You can be
Anything you desire to be
Just put your devil aside
Cage him and give him a steel, spiked, painful leash
So that he does not come out
Though he may stir
When you have done this you truly have won
And you are not the first, wont be the last
Help another, give back
But now as time goes
Make sure it counts


Make sure it lasts!

Died and Came BACK!

 I was dead
I was gone
It was black
There was no song
There was no light
There were no gates
There was no welcome
No feeling of fate
There was no feeling of home or comfort
Only feeling alone
Like a desert
A desert of nothing
A desert of pitch black

I could not see
I could not fight
I was in limbo

If I could have felt,
It would have been utter fright
Utter terror
A horror
A mighty feeling that nothing is right
And that it's all over and it's all wrong
I am dead in a terrifying place I do not belong.

But then there were hands and for the first time I felt
I could feel them on mine as if they melted into one,
and I saw their beautiful faces; my loved ones,
as bright as the sun,
and they pulled me back and away from the dark.

They pulled me to life to tell me "Hello, it's ok, you can just talk,
and you can live with our constant LOVE."

And I was back